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| Photo credit: Jaume Escofet |
I am so lonely.
You wouldn't think it from my email contact list - it's very full. But nevertheless, my heart is aching from the emptiness. I long for intimate friendships, for people who open wide their hearts and take the time to pour into my soul, and let me pour into theirs. Who will make time for me in their life and room for me in their hearts.
And you know what? That's OK. God created us for communion with each other, and so it's only natural for me to feel lonely when deprived of close and constant friendships. It's not some sort of spiritual weakness.
What would be not OK is if I believed the simple, subtle lie that I am awfully tempted to believe in this time: you're alone.
But that is not true. Oh, praise God it isn't! God is here with me, always with me!! And this is what I've come to know deeper during this season of loneliness. There have been many times I've fallen to my knees in joy and worship as the reality of God's nearness and comfort sweeps over me.
You rescued me and I believe
that God is Love and He is all I need,
from this day forward, for all eternity.
I'll never wander on my own,
for I am Yours until You call me home.
I close my eyes and I can hear You say
"You're not alone."
~ Owl City, You're Not Alone'
I'm not alone. I'm not alone.
Cassie xoxoxo
Cassie. :( I'm sorry. I've fallen for the same lie over and over again. If you want anyone to talk to, you know where to find me. :) As a side note, I really like that song.
ReplyDeleteSeveral things flooded my mind as I read this post <3 First things first, though-- (((HUGS))) I SO get what you're saying, and NO you are NOT alone- in feeling like this! I get it. Second thing that came to mind was what you said about your very specific desires and how those desires ARE O.K.!!!! Your thoughts echoed how I felt when I wrote my post Filled to be Emptied, and reminded me of it. (http://hisprincesswarrior.blogspot.com/2014/04/filled-to-be-emptied.html).
ReplyDeleteI'm not sure I necessarily fall for the "you're *alone*" lie as much as when I'm super lonely I fall for the "you're inadequate- you're not enough- and that is why no one loves or wants you" lie :(
I really love that song you quoted (so does one of my sisters-- it's been popping up a lot for me lately lol). Another one, a more soothing, hymn-like one your post instantly reminded me of was "Alone, Yet Not Alone" (kind of the theme for the movie of the same name). You might find that one encouraging, as well! (http://www.amazon.com/Alone-yet-Joni-Eareckson-Tada/dp/B00HRN0BZ2/ref=sr_1_1?s=dmusic&ie=UTF8&qid=1439527670&sr=1-1&keywords=alone+yet+not+alone)
Anyway, I know that's LOT of rambling, but this post really brought a lot to mind! <3 You are NOT alone my friend! I am encouraged by how you've allowed God to draw you to Him through this season of yuck :( ;) ((hugs again))